Wednesday, 30 October 2013 16:03

Dave Thornton: Comedy Showdown

Funny man Dave Thornton talks about the secrets of the comedy industry, his love for silverside and plans for riding out of the casino on a brand new jet ski.

Set to perform a special one-night-only comedy show at Jupiters Casino, the all-star cast couldn’t really get any better with Dave performing alongside Peter Helliar, Wil Anderson and Hannah Gadsby.

“All the audience members know that with a line-up like that, no one’s phoning it in. Because every comedian's ego will jump out and say ‘I do not want to go on in front of all these great comics’. When you've got all these great comics, it's just one big pissing match. We're all trying to outdo each other. So the winner is the audience and the loser is probably the comedian's ego.

“Like so many comedians and like every comedian on that list, I'm starved for attention, and a gig like this is going to get me a lot of attention, so ... [laughs]. With a great crowd and laughing at all your stuff, any comedian is going to be chomping at the bit.”

Performing on TV, radio and stage, he’s done it all.

“I think each one is almost like a break from the other. I do one and I think ‘this is heaps of fun’ and then I do it for too long and I go, 'I'm bored now'. Then I get to do something else and I go 'HOW MUCH FUN IS THIS!', then I get bored again. So it's this strange little cycle.

"I remember my mum used to feed me silverside a lot as a kid, corned beef, and there was just too much of it. And now, I haven't had corned beef in ages, I'd love a plate of that.”

It’s obvious that Dave’s got a cracker personality, but when asked he warns that revealing the secret to comedy might cause fireworks.

“This is like skulls, if I told you I would have to kill you. There is a secret, and we all do know about it, but we can't let the outside world know. We have killed men about it before. We're like the Knights Templar. We have to guard it with our lives.

"Every comedian does have [a go-to joke], like a ‘break glass in case of emergency’, but the unfortunate thing is that it is so powerful. Us comedians all know that there is a joke out there that is so funny that it's actually killed people. You want to use it tentatively.”

Famous for his appearances on comedy TV shows such as ‘Talkin’ ’Bout Your Generation’, ‘Good News Week’ and ‘The 7pm Project’, he can currently be found on the panel of Channel Ten’s ‘This Week Live’.

“I enjoy giving little Tommy (Tom Gleeson) shit. That is pretty much the most enjoyable thing I can find. Oh, I'm not sure if in your street press you can use the word 'shit', I can dumb it down for you. You can change it to 'crap' if you like.”

When asked if there was anything he hasn’t done yet in his extravagant professional career, he was optimistic.

“[I’d like to] hook-up with Eva Mendez. Is that possible? Could you write that down so that when it comes up in Google alert on her phone, so she'll know that I'm talking about her?”

As a final message to his Gold Coast fans, Dave made the following proposal.

“Maybe I could just put in a request. Maybe if all the people from the Gold Coast could come bearing gifts, that'd be great. Just try to up each other for all of it, that'd be good. There's nothing like a bit of Queensland hospitality to make you want to come back for more. Who knows? Maybe they could throw it all together and get us a jet ski.”

Dave Thornton performs in ‘Laugh Your Pants Off’ at Jupiters Casino November 8.


Published in Comedy
Wednesday, 06 March 2013 14:57

Dave Thornton: Brisbane Comedy Festival

Our favourite pencil-legged comedian returns with his new appropriately titled show, 'Tall and Pointy'.

Not only is Dave Thornton an actor and comedian, he’s also a professional procrastinator, so much so that he managed to write a 765 word post ALL ABOUT PROCRASTINATING. Alongside his love for blogs lies his beloved twitter account. “It has increased my potential to connect with anyone and everyone and made my procrastination that much more interesting. For instance did you know that Amazon dolphins are often involved in nasal sex? Thank you @WhatTheF***Facts.

“Tweets or blogs? To be honest I’d prefer foot massages at the beach whilst drinking Daiquiris but coming in second is either of those two.”

Onto 'Tall And Pointy', Thornton guarantees it’ll be completely in 3D and there will be 20% less lip syncing than previous years. “Stand-up can sometimes offend. We can swear and that may offend people. If you are offended by swearing know that police can now fine anyone who swears in public. I guess I’ll have to refer to them as lieutenants and ****stables now.”

We were impressed by his capabilities to act, write, present and be an all-round funny guy and wondered if there was anything he couldn’t do? “From what I gather, I’m only a few Peptide doses away from being an elite athlete.”
Elite athlete or not, Thornton said his TV time on ‘House Husbands’ and ‘Talking 'Bout Your Generation’ was fun. “Yeah it was a bunch of fun, even a punnet of fun. Possibly a bouquet of fun. All of the above”.

His three theories to overcome a stuffy audience include answers like, “Look into the sun? Hold your breath? Swallow a spoon full of sugar. No, wait, that’s sneezing isn’t it?”

Anyway, a final note for hecklers — just don’t. “You’ve paid for this service so why ruin it? It’s like booking a plumber to come in and fix a broken pipe only to kick the pipe in as he’s finishing up. It’s your money you’re wasting!”

See Dave Thornton from March 5-10 as part of the 2013 Brisbane Comedy Festival at the Brisbane Powerhouse.

Published in Comedy
Wednesday, 23 March 2011 12:05

Dave Thornton

Comedy in Preview

On the one hand, you have a legend, an icon for his generation and a once-in-a-lifetime superstar. And on the other, you have Dave Thornton who, and by his own admission, is not quite any of those things … yet.

In his latest stand-up show 'I Want To Be Bruce Lee', the Melbourne-based comedian discusses “reaching your 30s, not wanting to grow up, not doing what you thought you would” and all the while comparing himself to the world's most famous martial artist. â€œThe best way to describe it would be being in a kind of purgatory; not wanting to go to nightclubs anymore, but not quite ready to spend my weekends at Bunnings,” Thornton explains.

Written while he was in Edinburgh last year, it seems no one from within his circle of family and friends is immune from being used in his material. “They are stories from my life, so it's good that I will be a few states away from friends and family while I do these shows,” he laughs.

Dave Thornton performs At the Brisbane Comedy Festival until March 27.

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